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Lebron James to Raise Money in Basketball
Chute-Out
Unless
you have been living under a rock for the last 4 months, it is likely
you have heard of LeBron James. Of course if you have been living
under "The Rock" for the last 4 months then you have probably
inherited the nickname "The Oral Damn". LeBron James is
a 6 foot 8, 17 year old who is taking the basketball world by storm,
and in the process making a name for himself off the court by taking
an active role in raising money for various charities.
His latest act of good will is a one on one
basketball game pitting himself (Lebron James) against Le Brown
James - a French porn star specializing in feces themed movies.
The event has been appropriately named "The Cleveland Brown
Chute-Out" and is an attempt to raise money to help clean up
"The Cleveland brown" - not to be confused with the NFL
Franchise (The Cleveland Browns).
"The Cleveland Brown" has plagued residents of Cleveland,
Ohio for several months now. The majority of sewage systems in the
greater Cleveland area have been inoperable and therefore drainage
areas have backed up and caused quite a mess in the streets. Roads
have been closed and the large scale, public dung fights have started.
It is true what they say; "Close only counts in horseshoes
and large scale public dung fights".
"The
Cleveland Brown" is the result of a late night celebrity pool
party gone bad. The party was hosted by Cleveland's finest - Arsenio
Hall. For the majority of the readers that haven't heard of this
quasi-celebrity, Arsenio has appeared in many television comedy
classics like "the Magic Hour". The details of the incident
concerning what actual caused the massive sewage back up are unclear,
but we do know that it occurred when the entire cast of "The
Cosbies" arrived via limo to the pool party. Non-metaphorically
speaking, it was when the Cosbies were dropped off at the pool that
things started to clog.
LeBron James has taken it upon himself to raise money to provide
the financial aid necessary to pay for this expansive cleanup. All
in attendance at the basketball game will pay $25 dollars to attend
with all proceeds going to clean up "The Cleveland Brown".
Many people have questioned how competitive the actual game will
be considering Le Brown James has very little basketball experience
and LeBron James is a coke dealer. Organizers have promised an unforgettable
event, announcing that LeBron James will consume 25 ml of Blue Pepsi
before the game, which will ensure that he is playing partially
blind and or crippled.
The lesser-known Le Brown James he has starred in adult remakes
of the following movies, the Black Hole, the Last Starfighter, and
the Canon Ball Runs. He has also been known to deliver the always
crucial chocolate shot at will. He will be fully diapered during
all points of the game.
When asked about whether or not he feared Lebron's outside shooting
skills, Le Brown stated with confidence that he isn't worried about
the three pointers and is only focusing on what he knows best, the
deuce.
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